She is the friend who calls you up just because. She wants to hear your voice, hear about your day, tell you about hers.
She shares deeply with your sorrows…gets right in the trenches with you..and perhaps even rants at the waves that rage against you even louder than you do.
She sits around a kitchen counter chopping onions, making fresh taco shells, homemade salsa and makes the best cup of coffee. She laughs with you, dreams with you, cries with you..sometimes over spilled milk and sometimes over those chopped onions.
She has known you since you were 9 and remembers how horrible you looked with short hair.
She met you in your twenties when your hair was at its best.
She still thinks you are lovely even when you find that piece of silver flowing from your temple.
She will watch Beaches with you for the 40th time.
She will watch Hallmark Christmas movies and bake cookies with you in July.
She will laugh at you when you are 41 and still shop at Forever 21.
She will bring you a plate of freshly baked gluten free, dairy free cookies because you have every allergy known to man.
She isn’t offended that you can’t spend hours on the phone because you have 4 little people clinging to your knees.
She will make you laugh when you are afraid of tomorrow.
She prays with you.
She sings with you.
She rejoices with you.
She laughs with you.
She mourns with you.
She calls you up to where you need to be.
She pulls you back down to reality.
She lifts you up.
She holds you together.
She doesn’t compete with you.
She celebrates you, your similarities and your differences.
She is not perfect and does not expect you to be either.
“Don’t expect your friend to be a perfect person.
But, help your friend to become a perfect person.
That’s true friendship.” – Mother Theresa
She is not just one…she is many of the women you need in your life.
Friendship is less about finding one friend who is exactly like you and more about enjoying the fruitful bounty of life giving beauty through many.
She is the one who is older in years and wise enough to give hard answers to hard questions.
She is the one who has seen you at your best and loves you in yoga pants with tattered fly away tresses.
She is the one who came as a surprise breath of fresh air at a stage in your life when you didn’t realize you could still make new “soul” friends.
These are the women God gives to us not in fragments but that all together make a beautiful tapestry of the loveliest shapes, sizes and colors.
We so often look for that “perfect” one size fits all friend who can be all things but God is the most kind God to offer us many kinds of friends to weave unique friendships for all seasons.
At 41 I am still making new friends. Young ones, older ones, seasoned ones remaining open to not the perfection that one person can bring but the perfecting in me that comes from learning from a multitude of souls. I see pieces of the Savior in each of them, I learn from each of them, I invite them into my heart and they have invited me into theirs.
The friend who offers a cup of warm tea to strengthen tired bones is as needed as the one who offers brave words of honesty to sharpen our souls.
The friend who will cry with us over that feared diagnosis is as needed as the one who will remind us that God is still God in spite of our weakness.
The friend who will endlessly stalk google to help search for answers to a current crisis is as much needed as the one who will intercede in prayer for hours without us even knowing it.
The friend who is willing to shop for hours looking for the perfect brow kit is as needed as the one who can see us completely raw and undone.
We learn from the friends who lead us through quiet examples of humility.
We stretch from the friends who are brave enough to dip toes in unknown territory.
We mend from the friends who will listen without needing to fix.
We grow from pouring out from the abundance that these friends have poured into us.
Friendship is imperative at 9 and 41.
Friendship is life giving if we choose to receive it.
Friendship is satisfying if we embrace what is given.
Friendship is being taken in its smallness, broken, offered and poured out for one another. Many small pieces make for a full abundant meal that satisfies.
Cherish your friendships, embrace your ‘sameness’ and learn from your differences, receive what is given and give without expecting …you’ll be refreshed by its rich , diverse abundance.