Entrusted with much..

Entrusted. I am entrusted with the hearts of 4 beautiful amazing gifts.

Entrusted to love them well, entrusted to lead them, entrusted to leave an imprint on them that secures their little hearts to Jesus.

I have been given a responsibility. A huge responsibility to be faithful with that which I prayed for. My children are a dream realized. It wasn’t long ago that my husband and I were struggling with infertility.

It wasn’t long ago that I didn’t know if I would know the life scenes I see today. Not long ago my house use to be really clean…I use to sleep…A lot. I use to eat a whole meal and drink my coffee Unmicrowaved. Today …I eat standing up, my house is now filled with random crayon art on various walls and furniture, my couch has petrified banana somewhere and those smudges on my French door…well I don’t bother windexing them anymore.

To be honest though the smudges and the crayon marks in a weird way are a huge blessed reminder for me…a reminder that there was a time when my heart ached and longed to have little finger smudges on my perfect little bed and breakfast. There was a time when I dreamt through my friends lives.

I remember the sting of infertility, I will never forget it…and I dont want to because to forget the suffering and the longing would be to ignore the longing fulfilled. Today and everyday I look at my children and see living, breathing memorials of Gods faithfulness to me…not that I deserved to have my cup this full…but He chose to bless me 4 times what I longed for.

He chose to leave an imprint on my heart through the lives of hope and innocence found in my precious little people. While I have been given such a huge responsibility to lead and guide them they have taught me more.

I have learned more about what love and sacrifice looks like when I look into their bright eyes everyday. I have learned more about a God who loves me through them…through my intense immeasurable love for them I see but a glimpse of how the creator sees and loves me…and has entrusted me to show them Him….I have been entrusted.